You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
Randomize