So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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