He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
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