You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
