how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
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