Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
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