i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
