It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
Randomize
