That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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