I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Randomize
