Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
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