he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
Randomize
