Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
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