Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Randomize