Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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