So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
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