It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
Randomize
