it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
Randomize
