He had one of those small greek statue penises
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
how drunk are you?
Several
Randomize
