I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
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