I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
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