Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
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