they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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