me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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