I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
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