pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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