the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
Randomize
