Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
Randomize