I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
