i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
