when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
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