its not stalking. its research.
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
Randomize
