is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
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