can we get nightvision for the apartment?
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
Randomize
