I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
