I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
We got so high we made milksteak
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
i out mim tonsoeep
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Randomize