So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
Randomize
