I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
