I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
I was told I sang Taylor Swift's entire discography in between violent bursts of green vomit before falling asleep in the bath tub
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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