No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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