fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
Randomize
