My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
being pregnant is like rehab
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
Randomize