So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
Randomize
