Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
Are my feet made of real feet?
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
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