Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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