I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
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