She said her name was "party"
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
Randomize
