She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
it's great music for shaving your balls
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
