Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
Randomize
