Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
Church boner. Awkwardddd
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
Randomize
